Smiling
by vocaloidpowerpuff potter
Summary: Ok first sad angst thingy Rated M for suicide Fem!Canada and Fem!America
1. Chapter 1

Smiling. Laughing. Joking. It's all a mask that I wear.

Screaming. Crying. Dying. This is who I really am.

"Who are you?" That damn question caused all of this.

"Oh. Hi… Are alright?" No I'm fucking dying everyday.

"Y-yeah… I-I'm f-fine….." Grow a pair self. Tell them what the hell is going on!

"Ok… umm…Who ARE you?" There's the damned question again.

"I-I'm M-Madelyn" You know the person that made 3 great inventions that YOU use every damn day.

"Oh I'm sooo sorry." Yeah sure you are.

"Oh look at the time. I have to go and ..do ..stuff…Yeah Go do stuff. …hehe"

I've heard enough to know that my own damn sister doesn't want me here.

"Okay. Drive safe Amelia. Buh-bye" Smiling that gaggingly sweet smile I smile everyday. But never feel.

With that said I'm all alone… again.

Might as well go to bed…

I start the bath tub while I take my Zoloft. After staring at my vampire pale skin that has bones sticking out, I figured out I forgot something…..in the kitchen.

I came back into the bathroom and smile a weak smile that's true and submerged myself in the warm waters. I take the special treat that I brought from the kitchen. I hold it up to my wrists and slice. I slice over and over again till I lost enough blood to faint.

Goodbye everyone. If you re…mem..ber.. m..e


	2. Why?

Amelia was awestruck at what happened. One minute she was at her sisters, the next she received a phone call saying her beloved Maddie is gone. Questions flew through her mind and left as quickly as they came but one stuck.

_Why?_

That one word is why she can't sleep at night. She just pondered and pondered. Every once in a while she would stop pondering enough to tell everyone the news. Now she knew what was going on.

Every phone call she made the person on the other end said, "Who? Oh Maddie? Oh goodness. Who was she again?"

She now knew why. Why Maddie was depressed. Why she thought it would be better if she left, but the truth is she didn't need to go.

"WHY WASN'T I THERE FOR HER? SHE NEEDED! ME WHY DID I LET HER GO?" Amelia asked herself while punching what ever was in front of her. "W-Why

c-couldn't I tell her… I-I l-loved h-her?"

Now it was too late to do anything. Maddie's gone and nothing can change that.

**-TIME SKIP ONE WEEK LATER-**

(AMELIA'S POV)

Today was her funeral. Not many people came only Arthur, Alice, Francis, Marieanne, Matthew, Alfred, and I. No one shed a tear accept Matthew and I. After the memorial everyone left. Now I was all alone.

So this is how Maddie felt? You feel so empty being alone.

Do you know what. I'm going to miss her. Her honey blond hair that shined gold in the sun. Her violet eyes that changed depending on her mood.

Now days the question plaguing her mind is now plaguing mine "_Should I …_?"

**A/N: Should I continue? Should she join Maddie? Idk. Please R&R.**


	3. Chapter 3

(Amelia POV)

It's been four months. Four fucking months and I still think about it. No one knows, and no one cares. Not Mom, not Dad, not Alfred, hell not even Matthew. If I were to disappear today nobody would give a fuck.

But, I don't do it. I want to have a family. Even if it's dysfunctional and adoptive, it's better than nothing. "Live Laugh Love" is what loops through my head as I walk a lonely street, not knowing where I'm going. After a while I find myself in front of Mattie's house, and knocking. Matthew answers the door surprised by my undone hair and face.

"M-May I help you?" he asks cautiously. As if I could hurt him.

"M-May I come i-in?" I asked with my voice cracking, damn it be stronger self.

He looks shocked and let me in right away. "What's wrong Amelia?"

I stay silent for a while but end up whispering, "I-I need help Mattie."

"Why sweety?"

I start crying and muttered, "I want to join her, Maddie, I loved her, and I still do but I can't bring myself to do it. I try over and over but they end up half assed. I'm sorry for bugging you. You probably don't even want to see me or know anything about me." At this point I'm bawling and am mumbling 'nonsense' while and hugged tightly by Mattie.

"Nonsense! Amelia, I want to know if you want to join her. When did you start feeling like this?" he asked while rubbing my back trying to calm me down.

"Wh-When sh-she left." I muttered while trying to become closer to him trying to feel any sort of warmth. Now that I think about it I feel a lot better. "D-Do I have to go to a shrink, Mattie?"

"Probably, but it would help a lot. I promise," he says, pulling me onto his lap and holding me close.

"How would you know!" I yelled while throwing a little kid tantrum.

"Shhh," he muttered, "I know because I've had to do it before."

I stopped thrashing at its words. "You've had to go to a shrink before?" The man only nodded as if he was ashamed of it. "For what?" I asked cautiously as if he will throw me out of his house.

He stayed silent for a couple minutes but, eventually muttered, "For the same reason, except it was before Maddie." His blue-violet eyes became glossy as he tried to hide his tears. I slid off his lap and put him on mine and tried to console him.

"I'm sorry I brought it up. It's going to be okay. Please don't do it." I mumbled in his ear.

"Who are you trying to convince, Amelia? Me or your self?" Matthew growled. Then he became silent. I look at him and he's fast asleep. I lay him on the couch and put a quilt on him. On my way out the door, I answer.

"I don't know."


End file.
